Wondering how to talk dirty to a girl without sounding awkward, creepy, or like a budget porn actor?
You’re not alone and you’re in the right place. The truth is, dirty talk isn’t just a kinky side dish; it’s the secret sauce that can drive her wild with nothing but your words. Whether you’re whispering in her ear, sexting, or talking dirty during sex, the right phrases can unlock a level of arousal no touch can match.
I didn’t fully grasp the power of dirty talk until I started experimenting with it in real life. One cheeky line during foreplay turned into her begging for more. One teasing text turned into an all-night sexting marathon. The right words, at the right moment, flipped a switch in her. And once I figured out how to talk dirty the right way? Game over. She was hooked.
In this guide, I’ll break down exactly how to talk dirty to a girl—step by step. From dirty talk examples to turn her on, to what to say over text, to what not to do (seriously, stop quoting bad porn scripts), this is everything you need to heat things up, keep her craving more, and never run out of sexy things to say again.
Find out how dirty she REALLY is…
I never realised the true power of talking dirty to a girl until I read an article online one day randomly and just started implementing it on all of my girls (mostly during foreplay).
I can’t remember what I read exactly but it said something like… “mental stimulation is as important to a woman as physical stimulation”.
Meaning they love to be teased and played with mentally (with dirty words) so they can fantasise about what you’re going to do to them.
When you do it correctly, you’ll not only be able to make her orgasm very quickly but you’ll have her hounding you for sex… texting you at all hours, calling you, messaging you on Facebook… the works.
Also if you can do this with multiple women, it can lead to a very healthy sex life for you.
All that with just “dirty talk”.
Crazy right?
So that’s what I’m going to talk about today. The art of dirty talking to girls and how to do it properly, so that you can have her in your bed with just one text.
Before we get into the nitty gritty, let’s first answer a common question…
What type of girls respond well to dirty talk?
I get this question a lot.
And you’ll probably be surprised by the answer.
Ready?
ANSWER >> All girls respond V-E-R-Y well to dirty talk!
Yep you heard me.
They all love a bit of dirty talking… whether it’s in the bedroom, in a text message or even on the phone.
But they need to be warmed up first before you start spouting deliciously filthy words to make her wet and begging you to pin her down.
Like I’ve said before… attraction isn’t an on/off switch, it’s a dimmer switch you need to turn up slowly.
Lay down the groundwork and use these key ingredients
Girls need to be able to trust you implicitly and feel extremely comfortable in your presence before you can start talking dirty to them.
This means building rapport, comfort and attraction over weeks. Don’t get me wrong, it can sometimes be hours, depending on how sexual the girl is. But in most cases it will be a few weeks.
Kick start the filthy goodness with a fantasy or Q&A
When you’re out with her next or you’re on the phone, even texting… be sure to kick things off with a fantasy swap or Q&A session that will set you off on the right “dirty” track.
Say something like “What’s something you’d like to do but haven’t gotten around to it yet in the bedroom?”
Or
“What’s the craziest thing you’ve done during sex with a guy?”
Or
“What do you enjoy most during sex..?”
Anchor certain words or phrases during sex
Assuming you’ve already had sex with this girl you can drop a few dirty phrases in here and there that you can use later on outside of the bedroom in a text or actually in person when you’re out with her.
For example, as you’re humping away you could get right up close to her ear and whisper… “Oh my god, your pussy feels so good”.
Or
“Baby your ass is perfect” (whilst slapping a cheek).
Or
“Wow, your breasts are absolutely perfect” (whilst sucking on her nipples).
Dirty complementary talk is always a winner, so don’t be afraid to throw a few compliments her way during a session.
After you’ve had sex, you can text her and say “I’m still thinking about how amazing your ass is… that was seriously incredible x”.
Also listen to what she throws out during sex, she may say something like “F*ck your cock is so big, it feels so good”.
You can then use that later on when you’re talking to her or texting her… “I can’t wait to f*ck you with my big dick later… I’m gonna have my way you you.”
Text, Call, or DM—Just Use Your Best Tool to Connect
Some guys prefer texting, whilst others like hearing a girls voice on the phone. I personally like texting and Facebook because it really builds the tension up over several hours and she’ll be imaging what you’re going to do to her all day.
It’s important to keep the sexual tension building until you meet her in person and just keep ramping up the dirty talk until the last minute.
Keep her wanting more…
Always be the one to initiate the dirty talk and keep pushing it each time so that it gets dirtier and more exciting, otherwise it can get pretty boring if you keep saying the same stuff over and over.
If you’re seeing her that night, you can something like “Guess what… you’re mine tonight…”
This will get her mind racing and she might even come back with “Oh yeah? And what are you going to do to me…”
Or you can say…
“I just looked at your Facebook shot with you in the bikini and you’ve got me all worked up now!”
Certain things you should never do…
There are some things you shouldn’t do when trying to talk dirty to a girl, here they are.
- Don’t jump straight in when you first meet her and talk dirty, you’ll just come off as a crazy perv and she’ll be freaked out by it.
- Don’t sound robotic… like “Ooo.. yeah… baby… you… like… my… cock” You just sound like an idiot. Keep it natural, talk slowly or text/type in detail.
- Don’t go over the top you freak! Ok I understand you might have watch some really nasty stuff on Porn Hub, but it doesn’t mean your girl needs to hear it. Unless of course she asks you to, there are definitely some girls that love the aggressive dirty talk.
What should you do if she responds negatively?
If a girl gets angry when you start dirty talking it’s probably because you did something wrong like (introducing it to early on, getting too aggressive too quickly or using a word she didn’t like) so take a step back and analyse the situation.
Then get back in touch with her and say something like… “Aww, I didn’t mean to offend you… was just playing young lady… I’ll be gentle x”.
How far should you take it?
This really depends on how dirty the girl is and the only way to find that out is by pushing the boundaries each time. So you will start off with the mild stuff like… “Damn you smell so good” (whilst smelling her neck slowly).
Then you’ll move onto something a little more frisky like “I’m so hard right now, look at what you’re going to me” (taking her hand and placing it on your cock).
After a few weeks (even months) you could take it to the extreme and see how she reacts. Something like “You love my big cock inside you don’t you… you dirty little whore”.
WARNING: Some girls can get offended by extreme dirty talking, but some with get into it. So always test the waters and slowly get deeper into the dirtiness.
How to Build Sexual Tension Before Dirty Talk Even Starts
If you want to master how to talk dirty to a girl, you need to know this: the words are only half the game. The other half? It’s sexual tension, the build-up that makes those words hit 10x harder.
Talking dirty without tension is like lighting a match in a wind tunnel. No spark, no fire. But when you set the mood first? One sentence can set her body on fire.
So how do you build that tension before you even open your filthy mouth?
Start with subtle compliments that make her feel desired, not objectified. Think:
“That look you gave me earlier? Dangerous.”
“You’ve got no idea what that dress does to me.”
Your tone matters too. Talk slower. Drop your voice slightly. Let pauses hang. You’re not just speaking—you’re creating suspense with your words.
Physical cues count, even through text. Use a few ellipses… to suggest your thoughts are drifting somewhere dirty. Or drop a vague line like,
“If I told you what I’m thinking right now… you’d either blush or block me.”
That one? Almost always gets a reply.
The goal is simple: make her mind race. Don’t dump your whole fantasy at once, tease it out. Build the vibe. Then, when you finally talk dirty, she’s already halfway there.
Dirty Talk Text Templates You Can Copy and Use
Most guys want to talk dirty but freeze when it’s time to type it out. So here’s a gift: a dirty talk cheat sheet you can copy, paste, and tweak to fit your style.
Early Flirty (Safe and Subtle)
Perfect for when things are just heating up:
- “You looked way too good today. That should be illegal.”
- “I can’t stop replaying that hug… I was definitely not thinking PG thoughts.”
This builds intrigue without being explicit. Great for texts or Instagram DMs.
Mid-Level Tease (When You’re Comfortable)
Use these once you’ve exchanged some heat:
- “If I was next to you right now, I wouldn’t be saying a word… I’d show you exactly what’s on my mind.”
- “That pic you just posted? I’m not okay. My hands are officially jealous of your sheets.”
Now you’re mixing imagination with intention. She knows where it’s going, and she’s probably down.
Full-On Sexting (She’s Into It)
When you’re already dirty talking and she’s loving it:
- “I want you on all fours, hair pulled back, begging for more. That’s how I want to see you tonight.”
- “Remember how you were moaning last time? I want to hear it again, louder.”
Text-based dirty talk is especially powerful for building anticipation throughout the day. Just remember: match her energy, read her replies, and never overdo it.
What to Say Based on Her Personality Type
If you want to know how to talk dirty to a girl effectively, here’s a game-changer: tailor your talk to her personality. What turns on a bold, extroverted girl might completely shut down a quiet, reserved one.
Let’s break it down.
The Shy Girl
This girl needs patience. Start with sensual, suggestive language, not graphic. Build trust, go slow, and make her feel safe first.
Try:
“I want to explore every inch of you… but only when you’re ready.”
“You don’t have to say a word… I can already tell what your body wants.”
Avoid crude words early on. She may want to explore that side later, but lead with comfort and curiosity.
The Confident, Flirty One
With her, you can go bolder, she thrives on playful dominance and flirtation.
Try:
“If you keep teasing me like that, I’ll have no choice but to handle you.”
“I’m going to ruin that pretty little attitude of yours tonight.”
These women enjoy the power play. As long as you stay respectful and read the room, dirty talk becomes your playground.
The Playful Tease
She loves banter, bold humor, and cheeky lines. Make it fun, sharp, and flirty.
Try:
“That mouth of yours gets you in trouble… and I’m here to punish it.”
“You keep acting like a brat… you know what that earns you.”
Playful girls love being challenged, just don’t take it too far. Keep it light, sexy, and like a game you both enjoy.
Wrap-Up: Know Her, Read Her, Turn Her On With Words
Dirty talk isn’t one-size-fits-all, it’s personal, psychological, and powerful. If you want to learn how to talk dirty to a girl and actually turn her on, remember this:
- Build the tension first—dirty talk is foreplay before foreplay.
- Use text as your secret weapon—just one well-timed message can change her whole mood.
- Tailor your talk to her vibe—read her energy, not just her words.
And most importantly? Don’t be afraid to mess up a little. Dirty talk isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being present, confident, and connected.
So that’s how to talk dirty to a girl. Now go and put everything above into practice big man!
NOTE: Don’t forget, if you want to become a GOD in the bedroom, then you need to check this out.
Frequently Asked Questions: How to Talk Dirty to a Girl
How to start an 18+ conversation with a girl?
Start with playful, flirty energy before jumping into anything explicit. Compliment her vibe, tease her a little, or ask suggestive (not graphic) questions like,
“If we were alone right now, what would you want me to do first?”
This sets the tone for a mature, dirty talk conversation without crossing boundaries too soon.
What dirty things should I ask a girl?
If you’re wondering how to talk dirty to a girl, start by asking questions that let her imagination run wild. Try:
“What’s something you’ve always wanted to try in bed but haven’t yet?”
“What’s one thing I do that instantly turns you on?”
Make sure the questions match her comfort level and energy.
What are good flirty questions to ask a girl?
Flirty questions are perfect warm-ups for dirty talk. Keep it light and cheeky:
-
“What would you do if I kissed you right now?”
-
“What’s the most unexpected thing that’s ever turned you on?”
These create tension without being over the top, leading naturally into sexier talk.
What are seductive questions?
Seductive questions spark desire without being graphic. Try:
-
“What’s your favorite way to be touched?”
-
“Have you ever fantasized about someone while texting them?”
This builds intimacy and lays the foundation for hotter conversations later.
What are juicy questions to ask a girl?
Juicy questions mix curiosity and heat. Examples:
-
“What’s the naughtiest thing you’ve done in public?”
-
“What would you do if we had one night with no rules?”
These questions are a smooth bridge from flirty to full-on dirty talk.
How to be flirty with a girl?
Be playful, confident, and slightly teasing. Say things like,
“You’re trouble, aren’t you?”
or
“Careful… keep talking like that and I might have to do something about it.”
This builds attraction naturally and can lead into dirtier dialogue if she’s into it.
How to flirt with a girl using words?
Flirting with words is an art, and it’s also the first step in learning how to talk dirty to a girl. Use descriptive compliments, inside jokes, or naughty hypotheticals. Don’t just say “you’re hot.” Instead, try:
“Every time I look at you, I forget what I was saying.”
or
“I wonder what would happen if I whispered what I’m thinking in your ear right now…”
What’s a spicy question to ask a girl?
A spicy question hints at desire but still keeps things fun. Try:
“If I blindfolded you and had my way with you, what would you hope I’d do first?”
“If we were alone for one hour with no clothes… how would you want to spend it?”
Questions like these heat up the conversation fast, just be sure she’s into it.
How to flirt at 40?
Flirting doesn’t expire with age, it just gets better. At 40, lean into confidence, humor, and sensuality. Dirty talk at this age is more about emotional seduction and tension than raunchy lines. Try:
“I know exactly how to make you feel wanted, and I plan to prove it.”
“Age has only made me better at this. Want a preview?”
You should read these too:
“Aww, I didn’t mean to offend you… was just playing young lady… I’ll be gentle x”
I’ve had a man try to play off dirty talk like this when it wasn’t wanted, and it did NOT help the situation, at all. It’s like apologizing, and then going right back and doing the same thing again! Like wtf, guy?! Like the “aaww” part is as if they’re being talked down to. It’s like us being offended is CUTE, and that is disrespectful since it’s not taken seriously. Just ask your partner what they want to hear? Ask them if they’re comfortable with dirty talk?
That’s actually really helpful … But don’t call her a whore … She might get mad …. I know I would . Sometimes instead of talking dirty though, you can push her against a wall and slowly kiss her.. Also stroke her hair.
some girls(like me) like to call guys daddy/sir/master, depending on how freaky they are. personally, i don’t like the idea of calling your woman a whore in bed, it’s an automatic turn off for some. i’d want to be viewed as your girl not a piece of meat. i say definitly make sure she’s into it before you fling around terms like “cock” “pussy” or anything that sounds quite vulgar. while some girls are into that(they’ve probably been damaged mentally in that regard, maybe sexual abuse) many find it very unattractive.
Some girls are more arrgestive then others, some girls like it a LITTLE rougher like u can turn her on by gently but seductively pushing her against the wall and kissing her. But dont kiss for like 5 mins straight take breaks and kiss down her jawline or suck and nibble on her neck and ear while have hot heavy brethe talk dirty girls love that.
You can talk dirty to a certain extent and it be PERFECT and ESSENTIAL to good sex
But…..READ CAREFULLY
DON’T call the girl a “Whore” ….. I’ve heard of a lot of ‘good/shy girls’ being talked dirty to and eventually getting off to that thought and started fantasizing about dirty dirty stuff, like cheating with every other guy possible, taking cum from everyone and eventually – Not even thinking about the person they’re with!!! bad for the man who wants to marry her : O and doesn’t realize what he has done to her
because of the GUY actually turning her into a WHORE in her MIND – SHE COULDNT GO BACK ='(
Ancient Prophecy stated the only way out is FEELING Love and connectedness and kindness with good Hard SEX
Word of Wisdom:
Talk to the girl, the WAY YOU WANT HER TO BE – It’s programing the mind.. with the same understanding, you can turn her into the perfect girl who will ONLY WANT YOU, and will NEVER want to be with anyone else*****
Moderators, PLEASE let this through, we don’t want more generations of sluts….. WE WANT THE BEST SEX POSSIBLE BUT WITH GOOD INTENTIONS
Teach the same concepts with understanding of words in the mind ACTUALLY programing the individual
Please understand, Dirty talk is VERY HEALTHY, but don’t take it out of context
Much Respect,
CODY
I’m a guy and I LOVE YOU!
Yea I could offer a few dirty word suggestions that can turn women on in the bedroom, but don’t want to risk sounding too vulger. As far as what type of girls respond well to dirty talk, I’d say all of them if you got a big penis and know how to use it properly :)
Very good point about using the dirty words that she does. Ass is probably safe, but make sure that she’s OK with the words you use for genitalia and sex acts. If you use cock and she replies with dick, then use dick.
Hi Rich,
Thanks for the post. It’s very useful. Do you have a list of Dirty Words/Sentences that you can share with us?
That will help alot to those who’s English is not his native language or are new to dirty talk.
Thanks,