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A lot of men seem to have trouble when it comes to fully knowing if a girl is into them. Especially when the girl appears to be leading them on… like a cock tease.
This type of girl is the worst kind, because as it stands you’re never going to sleep with her. So you can either do one of two things. 1) Cut ties with her and walk away or 2) Change things up with how you treat her and try to cause some attraction spikes so that she begins to think differently about you, instead of just treating you like a friend (yuk!).
I received an email the other day from a reader, here’s what he said and below is my response:
Reader Question
Hey Richard,
I’ve read a few of your posts and came across you when reading The Natural a months back that a friend had sitting in his dorm room. I borrowed it, read it in one evening… and loved it, seriously it’s changed the way I think about women. But there wasn’t anything in the book that directly helped me with my current situation… hence the email.
Let me explain: I met this girl in college about 8 months ago and we hit it off straight away. She is cool, funny, very hot and popular with a lot of guys. When we go out together she says things like “You’re different to other guys” and “I think you’re so cute”. Which leads me to believe that she likes me right?
Well, here’s where I’m confused. She holds my hand, touches me in (non-friendly) places, flirts outrageously with me and has even stayed in my bed. BUT, every time I try and kiss her or have sex, she pulls away and says “I’m not sure we should do that”. So I’m like WTF??
I know she’s not a virgin, she split up with her boyfriend before coming to college and I’ve seen her kiss other guys like in a club on the dance floor, so she’s definitely not frigid. What is the problem? Am I doing something wrong?
HELP ME!
Thanks,
Aaron
My Response:
Hey Aaron,
Thanks for getting in touch and the compliments on the book. So this one seems to be a bit of a tricky one. From what you’re saying to me, it definitely does sound like the girl is a cock tease, especially if you’ve seen her kissing other guys in public and you know that she’s not a virgin. She could also be promiscuous so you should learn how to recognize a slut when you see one, then avoid her.
You could even be in the friend zone and she’s afraid of losing you, so turns up the sexual side to keep you thinking about her over other girls. A possessive, somewhat selfish side of her personality (signs of a broken girl). I’ve seen this with other girls in my life.
There are several things you can do in this situation:
1. If you really like her
Play it cool, don’t do what she wants you to do. Feel comfortable with disagreeing with her and taking the lead a little more. She needs to know that you’re not a pushover. Also try and take up a few more hobbies that you can occupy your mind with so you don’t constantly have thoughts about this girl.
2. If you aren’t bothered by her
If she turned around and said “I don’t think we should be friends anymore” would that bother you? If it does, then revert back to point one. If you said no, then start doing things that confuse her. Act like a player, just so you can flip the tables on her. Don’t answer her calls, send late replies to her texts, introduce her to girls when you see her out in bars/clubs, be more mysterious with your answers like when she says “Who’s that girl?” you can say “No one, just a close friend”.
The goal is to make her think that she’s losing you and this will change the way she treats you.
3. If you want to make her chase you
This could take several weeks to several months, but it’s what most guys would want I think. Work hard on doing exciting, interesting things. Be the go to guy with parties, nights out, be the guy that people have to be around and invite out. Get some interesting hobbies, update your social media accounts so they show you’re a very cool guy. You know by adding different types of photos/videos of you with girls, cool guys, you doing fun things, etc.
Don’t respond to her calls or texts for a short while (her respect for you will naturally grow), then reply out of the blue so that she can’t predict when you’re going to get in touch. This will drive her mad. When you eventually see her in person, act aloof and don’t give a shit what she is saying, just focus on having fun and not pleasing her.
That’s it dude, please let me know how you get on and hopefully things will play out for you.
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