A shit tests is something that girls do (usually more so when you first meet them) to see whether you’re man enough for them.
What do I mean by man enough?
I mean to see whether you are the “man” for her or you’re going to crumble like a little bitch.
Girls like to throw out tests or hurdles because they love games, they love it when a guy is chasing them… they crave the drama.
Never e shit tested again!
It gives them a sense of power, plus it helps them decide whether you’re the kind of guy they want to sleep with or chuck in the friend zone.
The term “shit test” is a community thing, but it’s something women have been doing for donkey’s years, that has had guys stumped for what to say or how to deal with these tests.
Today I’m going to show you a few common shit tests that I’ve gotten in the past and some I’ve heard my friends get… then I’m going to show you how to bust through them like the hulk biatches!
HOLD ON! If you’re sick of going through real world shit tests, then you should just bypass it and straight for online dating instead. Here’s a guide that will show you how to get ANY girl you want online.
The most common shit tests
You look like you’re a player… are you a player?
Why she said it: Girls don’t like players, so they have to check to see if a guy is a man whore before emotionally investing and possibly getting hurt.
What you need to say/do: “Well, when I am single of course I go out and meet lots of girls but I much prefer being in a relationship and when I have a girlfriend, i treat her well, and am a good boy but yeah when I am single I can be bad.”
How many girls have you slept with?
Why she said it: She’s worried that you’re not going to be faithful.
What you need to say/do: Tell the truth if it’s more than she likely has but less than 15. If more, it’s better not to say anything, so say you don’t count.
Give me your number and I’ll call you
Why she said it: She doesn’t’ trust you, because you haven’t built enough rapport with her yet. But she might still like you, which means you need to work harder.
What you need to say/do: You need to re-engage again with another hook and act like she didn’t just say that. Then after 2 more minutes of speaking, say to her “Ok listen, give me your number I’ll call you now so you have mine and I’ll text you later…”
Why are you talking to me?
Why she said it: She’s being a real ball breaker, this type of girl is approach constantly by men, so you need to be extra smooth with your game.
What you need to say/do: Look her dead in the eyes and say “Because you looked interesting from over there and I wanted to see if your looks matched your personality”.
Sorry I don’t give my number to strangers
Why she said it: She’s playing hard to get.
What you need to say/do: “Yeah I get that, especially in night clubs, but the problem is that most people meet through social circles which means its always the same old people, and most relationships don’t work out… sometimes it’s nice to take a chance… so i guess it comes down to whether you are adventurous or… not.”
OR
“Yeah I get that, and that’s cool actually, because most girls give their number out too easily, so lets add each other on Facebook, keep in touch, and if we feel like meeting sometime, maybe with our friends too, then cool, if not, no biggie.”
How to Deal with Shit Tests Like a Pro
So you’ve spotted the shit test coming—now what? Here’s the deal: passing isn’t about memorizing some cheesy PUA lines. It’s about holding your frame, staying calm, and showing her you’re a man who doesn’t bend under pressure. Here’s how to handle it:
1. Be Ready to Walk Away
Most guys fail because they’re terrified of “losing” her. They put her on a pedestal, thinking she’s the only shot they’ll ever have. That’s pure BS. A man with options doesn’t cling. If a test crosses the line or she’s clearly wasting your time, you need the confidence to walk away without a second thought. Think like an AMOG—the alpha male of the group—who doesn’t beg for approval. Women actually respect you more when they know you’re not afraid to leave.
2. Deflect Without Breaking Frame
Never let her control the conversation with a tricky question. The moment you start answering directly, you’ve handed her the power—and you instantly become her puppy. Instead, deflect with humor, tease her back, or flip the question in a playful way. This shows you’re unfazed and in control. For example, if she says, “Are you a player?” just smirk and reply, “Would it be more fun if I was?” See? No neediness. No overexplaining. Just smooth.
3. Re-Engage With a New Hook
Once you’ve deflected, don’t just stand there. Steer the conversation somewhere fun or intriguing. Drop an observational statement, make a witty comment about something in the environment, or lightly tease her again. It keeps the energy flowing and puts her back into your frame. Remember, every shit test is an opportunity to show you’re unshaken—and when you re-engage, you’re telling her without words, “Nice try, but I’m still leading this.”
The Psychology Behind Shit Tests
Before you start worrying about how to pass a shit test, you need to know why it even happens. Women don’t throw these tests just to be cruel or to see if they can make you squirm. Deep down, a shit test is a filtering mechanism—a subconscious way for her to figure out if you’re the kind of guy who can handle her, protect her, and not crumble the second there’s pressure.
Think of it like evolution’s built-in lie detector. Women have been doing this for centuries. It’s the same primal instinct that helps them choose a partner who’s confident, socially aware, and in control. When she asks, “Are you a player?” or “Why are you talking to me?”, she’s testing your frame—your ability to stay calm, playful, and unfazed. If you fail, you get instantly categorized as weak. If you pass, she sees you as the man who can lead without being needy.
Psychologically, women shit test for three main reasons:
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Confidence filtering – She wants to know if you really are the guy you present yourself to be. If you’re faking confidence, she’ll sense it.
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Social proof – She wants to gauge how other women see you. Are you high-value? Do you have options? Or are you desperate for her attention?
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Emotional security – She’s subconsciously looking for someone who won’t fold under pressure. If you can’t handle a playful test, how will you handle real life challenges?
Here’s the kicker: it’s not personal. Even women who are married or in relationships still use subtle shit tests to keep the dynamic exciting. Just like teasing foreplay keeps the spark alive, a playful test keeps the attraction fresh.
And here’s where most guys screw up. They overthink, panic, or get defensive. Maybe you’ve seen pickup artists (PUA training bootcamps love teaching this) talk about how to pass shit tests by memorizing lines. But in reality, the best response isn’t about clever one-liners. It’s about staying relaxed and unshakable.
The truth is, this same psychology applies in the bedroom. Women test your confidence there too. If you don’t know how to make her cum, or you’re afraid to explore her body, she feels it. That’s why guys who actually learn how to lick pussy like a pro, who know the best sex positions for small penis guys, or who understand the top 10 best sex positions to make a girl orgasm fast, always win. It’s about confidence under pressure, whether it’s a verbal shit test or a bedroom test.
So next time you see her throw a curveball, remember—it’s her brain saying, “Prove you’re worth my time.” Don’t see it as an attack. See it as an invitation to lead.
What you should never do during shit tests
- React emotionally – Heard the saying, “don’t react… but adapt”? This is very true, you should never react emotionally and snap at her, she will think you’re a dick and it will ruin any rapport you’ve built up. This is common for men when they deal with a cockblock.
- Play into her little game – Women like to be in control, so if you play along with her questions, act needy and answer everything she will have you by the balls. Keep her on her toes and she’ll keep coming back for more.
- Answer her questions directly – Never ever answer the question directly, always answer it with a funny response or don’t answer it at all. UNLESS it’s something totally unexpected, that’s the rule breaker. For example, if she says… “Are you a bad guy?” you say “Yeah sometimes”.
- Act like a needy bitch – Again, neediness will kill your game stone dead, so don’t whatever you do ask needy questions or act needy in any way.
How to Build Unshakable Confidence So Shit Tests Don’t Affect You
Passing shit tests isn’t about memorizing what to say. It’s about who you are. If you walk around like a nervous wreck, obsessing over “how to get laid fast” or worrying if you’ll fail again, women will sense it instantly. The key is inner game—the mindset that makes you unshakable no matter what she throws at you.
Here’s how you build that rock-solid confidence:
1. Stop Caring About Approval
When you care too much about what she thinks, you become reactive. You answer every question directly. Get needy. You play her little game. Instead, flip the script. Think, “I’m the prize here.” Women looking for sex are everywhere. Married women for sex, ladies looking for sex, women who just want excitement—there’s no shortage. When you have that abundance mindset, one girl’s opinion won’t rock your world.
2. Master Your Body Language and Tone
Most guys don’t realize how much they’re giving away. If you fidget, look down, or stutter when she tests you, it’s game over. Stand tall, make eye contact, speak slow and calm. That same energy applies in the bedroom. If you’re confident enough to talk dirty and know how to eat pussy like a pro, she’ll never second-guess your masculinity. A man who knows the best sex positions for small penis guys or the best way to make a girl cum fast exudes natural dominance.
3. Build Options and Abundance
A guy with zero options becomes desperate. And women can smell desperation. When you’re meeting other women—whether it’s through social circles, adult dating sites for sex, or even trying out the best fuck sites—you naturally stop overvaluing one single girl. Ironically, that’s when she starts chasing you.
Confidence Spills Into Everything (Including Sex)
When you’re confident, you don’t just pass shit tests—you dominate in every area of attraction. You’re the guy who knows how to make a girl cum fast, the guy who can try sex positions to make her orgasm, the guy who’s not afraid to explore a pussy eating guide or even learn how to make a girl ejaculate. Confidence means you’re willing to experiment with sex positions for smaller penis guys or even learn the best sex position to make a girl squirt without feeling insecure.
Women don’t want perfect. They want present. They want a man who’s in control, who makes her feel safe while turning her on. Whether it’s deflecting a shit test or knowing exactly how to lick her pussy until she loses her mind, it’s the same skill: calm, confident leadership.
And if you’re still doubting yourself? Remember this—confidence isn’t about never being tested. It’s about knowing you’ll always pass.
The bottom line is this, you will ALWAYS get shit tests from women. The more you practice dealing with them, the better you will become at making busting through them.
IMPORTANT: I rarely get shit tested these days. Wanna know why? Because I use under the radar attraction techniques like the IOI (indicator of interest) that girls can’t resist… for real. I also know how to interpreting female body language so I can tell if she’s interested by how she’s acting around me.
Keep deflecting those shit tests player!
Frequently Asked Questions about Shit Tests
Why do women test guys?
Women test guys to see if they’re confident, authentic, and emotionally strong. It’s a natural way to filter out weak or fake behavior and find someone who can handle pressure without crumbling. These tests often reveal whether you’re truly the man you present yourself to be.
Do women unconsciously test men?
Yes, many shit tests happen unconsciously. Women don’t always plan them—they’re instinctive reactions driven by attraction, curiosity, or the need for security. It’s their way of seeing if you’re worth their time without even realizing they’re doing it.
How to pass a woman’s shit tests?
Stay calm, keep your frame, and respond playfully instead of getting defensive. Never over-explain or seek her approval—deflect with humor or flip the script. The key is to show you’re confident and unbothered.
What kind of shit tests should a woman do?
Women usually test through teasing questions, small challenges, or playful pushbacks. Common examples include asking if you’re a player, pretending to doubt your intentions, or acting like they’re not interested. It’s all about seeing if you stay cool under pressure.
How to test if a girl is playing hard to get?
Watch her actions, not just her words. If she still makes time for you, responds consistently, and shows subtle signs of interest, she’s likely just playing hard to get. If she constantly flakes or avoids meeting up, she’s not interested.
How to make a girl fall for you?
Be confident, authentic, and emotionally present while giving her space to invest in you. Build a connection through humor, shared experiences, and genuine attention. Attraction grows when she feels safe, challenged, and excited around you.
How to tell if a girl is making excuses?
If she keeps canceling plans without suggesting a new time, or gives vague reasons that don’t add up, she’s likely not interested. A girl who truly wants to see you will find a way, even if she’s busy. Excuses are usually a polite way of saying no.
Do girls play hard to get with guys they like?
Yes, many girls play hard to get with guys they’re attracted to as a way to build tension and test his confidence. It’s a subtle way of making sure he’s genuinely interested and not just looking for something casual. If she’s still engaging, she probably likes you.
You should also read:
Girls don’t like players, BUT, they like to play a huge assortment of games themselves.
Women like to be in control, BUT, they like alpha males who are difficult if not impossible to control.
That’s why a lot of men nowadays don’t even bother approaching or engaging with women anymore. And they wonder why.
Dr. T. say NO to american “women”. Mentally deranged psychos.
If a girl show interest and sign thats she attracted and then suddenly ignore your text and phone calls.Is it also a shit test ?
yes. She is trying to see if you are needy. It not necessary to text everyday. Wait till she reaches out and when she does, you go “its great to hear from you sweetie, When are you free to get together next? I’d love to see you.” you make the date, get off the phone and wait till the day to see her. by not talking to her, it builds anticipation and more things to talk about.
Any guy who responds to a woman who plays games, by playing games in return, is setting his bar too low. A man should know where his boundary is, with his dignity on one side and his childhood on the other, and always be able to answer questions directly, forthright, and without fear. If that makes the conversation abruptly end, then that is what he should want. Or, restart the conversation with anything else that is not games. To play badminton using bullshit for a birdie makes both of you swinging your racket at a losing game.
Absolutely. I don’t play games. A woman has to deal with me in a straightforward way or I’m not dealing with them. I expect them talk with me, ask me questions, observe how I act and how I treat people, not engage in mind games and covert psych tests. If this is how they operate, then you’re going to be in for a rough time of it later in a relationship. I guess if getting in a girl’s pants is a guy’s only goal, then maybe they deserve each other – I just hope she doesn’t get pregnant. Any woman who’s worth having in a long-term relationship will value you for being a quality person, not for being a swaggering macho Neanderthal who plays a good game.
You guys are so wordy! Break it down to the minimum and feed in more only when needed. Control the conversation like a man. Let her know she’s in the wrong instead of explaining and talking and talking… You don’t need to escape the trap that you aren’t in… By acting like you’ve been caught, you have been.
“I could use your help.”
WAIT FOR RESPONSE!
No response, well, derp, she’s not interested. You didn’t do your job right pre-number. More just makes you needy. You’re gonna see her again at some point, right? WAIT FOR IT.
It may be a lsot cause. You can’t MAKE a girl like you. You can only make her like you more if she already does. Don’t go back for a second helping of rejection. Don’t be a stalker. Maybe she’s just feeling you out. If you don’t chase she will respect you. Why? You haven’t made her respect you. You simply didn’t throw away your respect by being a needy stalker weirdo. If you get the chance in passing give her the “thanks for all your help” sarcasm. Make it not about respoinding, but about not helping you out.
Does Goodbye..count as a shit test. Women say it too me all the time. If i hear it what do I. Wat do I.say or act
So if I have no other option but to walk away and the girl comes chasing after me, do i get back in the game with her or i walk away for good? I think if I come back after her chasing me that will show weakness on my part and she’ll always know she has me by the balls considering I wasn’t sufficient in my previous shit test. Lastly, is being shit tested an indicator of medium interest level only?
DUDE! If she came after you, she just admitted defeat! Sweet surrender! You showed that you’re a real man who doesn’t tolerate that crap, and she liked you enough to throw out all of it and do soemthing a girl never does; openly admit that you’ve got her hooked with real ACTIONS, not just words. Don’t let her right back in, but let her earn your attention back a little bit at a time. Make her work for the mistake and she won’t do that crap again. She’s admitting that she screwed up already. Don’t be direct about it, they can’t handle that. But, don’t let her out of it right away, either. Let her feel what it’s like. Make it memorable, that you’re willing to walk away. You’re not just another clown that’ll do anything for ass. YOU WALKED AWAY. No matter what the shit test is, you win when you walk away because you’re demonstrating self-respect and an unwillingness to tolerate being treated inappropriately. If it was noticed by others, when you turn your back, have that look on your face like you smell soemthing that stinks, not sad face. You’ll GAIN social proof from a negative encounter by showing that it didn’t hurt, but rather that you’re disgusted by such a terrible human being. You win if she lets you go, becasue a girl who will go that far to treat you like crap in 10 minutes of meeting is not a girl you want treating you like that for the rest of your life. You win if she surrenders and comes after you. There is no lose.
I had a five minute chat with this cute girl and we talked and talked and she was always smiling and laughing but after six minutes I ask her ok so listen I have to go is there any way we can stay in touch what’s your number ill text you but she kept saying ill think about it while smiling a lot is she playing hard to get or did I do something wrong need help please.
Never answer her shit tests directly ever. Are you a player, don’t even answer it.
how many people?
uhhhhhhhh like 300. (or think real hard for like 30 seconds and be like i dont freakin know)
Girl: seriously.
you: what in one night? then change topic really fast.
Why are you talking to me?
Wait what time is it?
8:30
Oh i didn’t know there was a no talking rule past 8.
Dont give my number out to strangers.
Sorry repeat that? lets see 909 223
she says something
change topic ask later
This crap works cause you over exaggerate her stupid questions (but act playfully) kinda coming off sarcastic making her question seem stupid in the first play. Never answer directly because you should think that her questions (shit tests) are stupid.
I met this chick with her mom in a club, very hot both of them but im interested in the daughter we’ve been going out few times already clubbing with both mom and daughter..mom has boyfriend…daughter says she has a bf. too but she never goes out with him.. i don’t know why they want hung out with me if both have bf. daughter gives me the impressionthat she is lying….daughter has a kid she says. and i asked her out just the 2 of us..also told her that i was interested on her.. and she said no only if the mom goes…since we been talking i got some gifts for the kid on his birthday….she was happy..At this point i need advice what to do. she post on fb. miss you. love you…thinking about you.. idont know if is for me or someone else or she is just playing with me…..honestly i dont know what to do…
How should our body language be during these shit test so that we look man enough with our responses?
Cool, calm and collected dude. Think Don Draper and watch how he reacts to women’s responses, that’s how you should be. Don’t react to the shit test.
When told, “i don’t give my number to strangers” i always respond with, “we’re all strangers at first”. They usually really like that.
Nice, like it.
What about ”We’re just friends” or something similar? I was escalating with this girl, we were lying on her bed, tickling each other and I was starting to kiss her neck when she gave me that test. I knew she liked me but didn’t know exactly how to respond to it. I kinda ignored it and changed subject.
the player line, can also mean she is attracted to the badboy image your are portraying
Very true, so you could work a response into that.
“Are you a player?”
“Yeah, I play football with my bros.” Accompanied by the “did you really jsut say that to me?” look. She should get the message that it’s a stupid question to ask. If not, tell her it’s a stupid question becasue, duh, a player is going to say know, so what’s the point of asking? Notice you’re saying the question is stupid, not her. Emphasize the weight of the question being stupid, and say why it’s stupid. Shows you weren’t born yesterday and that she might have been… If a girl over the age of 21 asks you this, she’s dumb as a rock.
thanks it’ just what i was looking for
Sent a text to a female classmate asking “Need your help with homework”
She didn’t reply. So maybe i shouldn’t have used the word NEED or maybe use humour instead?
Possibly, depends on if you’ve been speaking to her a lot in school? You could have said something like “(name)… this is an emergency! I suck at homework… hit reply with tips to help out a class mate in need :)”.